Emerging Conservative

OK, I hope you don’t mind a sappy post but I have had some thoughts going on ever since I had lunch with my parents a couple days ago. Since, Father’s Day is coming up, I’ll say that is part of it too.

I love my parents dearly even though I don’t get to see them as much as I used to when I lived closer. I cherish time with them and experiencing their personalities when we are together to remind me of my roots. I get the chance to remember my foundation they have provided me. Like any family, there are always a disfunctional aspect here and there and I am not unrealistic by forgetting those. At the same time, these things mesh into our history in such a way to add to the positives in our lives.

My father is an interesting man. In my growing up years as a child, I am not sure we felt very close though I do know there was love between us. I am not sure if he always knew during those early years how to click with us kids. He did what he knew to do which was to work hard and to provide for us. While some would say he was a workaholic (which may have an ounce of truth), I am at a place where I realize it was his ultimate expression of love to us. I did not want for anything that his hard work did not provide. By watching him, I learned what determination can do to keep you moving forward no matter what the circumstances are in your life.

I remember watching him walk through blizzard like conditions down the road to get home from his stuck car as he came home from work. How stubborn he was to even go to work in such conditions. However, I do the same thing and I am thrilled that he has given me the work ethic and strong will he has. He also gave me his temper when working on a project that is not going so well or someone else is trying to help me with. I am working on my temper and have been for years. It’s better than it was but in a weird way, even when I get cranky, I feel a connection with my father that I cherish.

In my adult years, our relationship has changed and I love it. Starting with a failed engagement I had with a young lady and building to be stronger when I made my mistakes that lead to an arrest, my father had opportunities to be there for me. I do not know how I would have gotten through those times and many there after without his slight humor, financial support, and willingness to provide for me when the chips were down.

My father has gotten much better at saying “I love you”. Up to the point of me turning 18, there were two or three times I remember hearing those words though I never doubted his love. However, in my adult years, I hear it every time we are together and I cherish it every time. He is a wonderful grandfather to all of our kids. He has become more comfortable with spirituality and I pray that he continues to do so more and more.

My father means the world to me and have many qualities that I pray are a part of my life. He is strong, determined, and you see a joy in his eyes when being with the grandchildren. He is a good man and I love him.

I do not even know how to begin to write about my mother. There is no doubt that I am what I am today because of her influence and sacrifice. She has traveled little, been humble in her possessions, and content with her life for the sake of her family.

Mom was the keeper of the home. She took care of the boo boos, the teenage challenges, the help with the homework, the relationship challenges, the heavy heart when she wished we would open up to her but we remained silent, driving us about (but not teaching us how to drive, that was dad), and hitting every performance no matter how lame the play or event.

I have never been secretive that she is my hero of my faith. You can talk about Billy Graham, Paul, and Peter himself but none have meant more to me than her simple faith. I do not know how she would have survived her life without her faith in God. It made her strong even when she felt week. However, she showed me more than that, she showed me the relationship that you can have with Christ that transcends knowledge or blind faith. Life has challenged me (including present day) and I have dug deeper into my faith over my life that has added more and more logical and relational foundation to what she has given me. However, even then, when life really sucks, it is her simple faith passed onto me that has made me able to move forward when all else fails.

She has had a lot of BS shoved upon her in her life by the very people who loved her most. I admire her for going through facing those memories, challenges, and emotions to stand on her own. She has had multiple physical challenges in her adult years and she continues to move forward. She is a stronger woman than she thinks and has taught me much. I will always have going to the movies to remember her as well. It is an experience I continue to have with my son and hope to have with my daughter to pass on those escapes, fun and fantasy she has given me.

My parents as a couple have their own balance and I pray it works for them. I pray for more days of happiness, comfort and family for them no matter what the outside circumstances. I pray for more oppurtunities to be with them as well as the rest of our family as we move forward in life.

I also thank them for my older siblings (the ones they practiced on before getting it right with me – just kidding). My sister and brother mean the world to me and I love and respect both so much. I will save more thoughts for another post as the scope of this one is my parents but I very much love you guys (if you ever happen to read this). So much of my life is shaped by you guys as well (even with the age differences). I then in turn thank them for the additional extended family you have given me that I love so much.

OK, enough love fest but I wanted to get some thoughts out on those that have made all else in my life possible. I love you and need you both. Prayers and Blessings!